time adds fluff to memory(:

ok, i banned myself from buying cd for a month. but now, a week away from the end of the ban, i already bought 3 CDs.

lindsay lohan's. rob thomas's. jesse mccartney's.

its $48 !!!! AHHH!!! i thought it was those $9.90 cause my sis told me she was in Chinatown. so normally, chinatown sells CD at 9.90 right? well, i hope this $16 a piece CD is actually not CHINA version. if not i will feel so damn bloody cheated.

oh, mandy moore's cd was outta stock. thank goodness.

the CD is all with my sis now. so i cant wait when she comes back on sunday so i can listen to the CDs. frankly, i am bought with all my old albums and Ashlee's and Avril's..hahah..

oh. i think i got an eye candy in school. haha. i think it wont last lah. it will end as soon as i stop finding dragonboat guys 'yummy'. which is gonna be quick i think. haha.

@ 12:42 AM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

i didnt realise how tired i was today until i went to take a nap. slept at 6 and woke up at 8.30..and i am still tired now..but i have to do econs and geo outline..sheesh..

had fun playing netball today! haha..nice nice and its funny..

okie..i am seriously brain dead now..cant think of what i want to say le.

@ 8:52 PM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

AHHH!!! i left my Shaman King 2 in my dads shop!!!

i asked them to help me find at the stationary shelf cause i was sitting there and they went to look at the magazine rack! -_-"

now what in the world will i place my comic there?!

i hope its still there tomorrow!!! people, remind me to call my dad to check for me right after PE!!! sheesh. now i cant start on 3 cause i havent finish 2!!!!

if someone took it, i hope their butt rots. and i mean it. or better still have constipation day in and day out.

@ 12:31 AM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

ohh..had lunch with snoopy charissa and yuting today at cafe cartel.

sheesh. my breast chicken with pasta smelt like amonia. geez i forgot to spell the name long time never take science le. but i ate the pasta and quite alot of the bread. hey, its free flow what!

we have agreed to go for cafe cartel's breakfast on saturday! but have to ask the rest first too...

its was so comfy there. after we finished, i just wanna longue there at the table with its comfy sofa to sleep or talk. haha.. oh yeah, i found this phrase on quizilla:

"Worry does not empty today of it's sorrow. It empties today of it's strength" - Corrie Ten Boom

Quite true eh?! shamen king!!!

@ 12:08 AM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

i love wednesdays!!!

first, i get to go home early.

second, i get to sleep.

third, i get to watch The Amazing Race, Shamen King and Inuyasha. muhahaha...

i just watch Shamen King. nicely done! haha..okie. the end result is that i didnt get anything done at all. i mean NOTHING. NADA.ZILCH. haha.

okie, off to pack bag then sleep le.

@ 12:01 AM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

i realise i use alot of "bleah" when talking to kelvin. -_-"

@ 12:00 AM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

okie. i just realise i actually have HOMEWORK. sheesh. and i was planning to play game till late. and theres PROBABILITY assignment tomorrow. gotta read notes for while later.

everyone is counting to A's. sccary..

*mutters incoherently to herself asa she goes takes her homework*

@ 11:24 PM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

slept until 8.30pm today. now still tired. having little headache.

i signed up for the trip to Pulau Tekong tomorrow. but in the end snoopy and weilin not going. so i decided to skip it. their names had been withdrew. but not mine. sheesh. i feel guilty about skipping...how?

but i dont want to go alone. not fun le like that.

@ 9:49 PM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

from deviantart by queen of dorks

so cute!! inuyasha! haha..

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

shamen king! haha..my revived favorite. haha. abit kiddy?! but NICE!!! i am still stuck at bk11! no money to buy..haha.. i think the spirit is so much handsome than the main character..haha..

@ 12:50 AM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

i had a sucky monday.

first was the surprise probability assignment. which is not that surprising actually. i got a hunch before i fell asleep last night. but i was just too lazy to put the probability stuff into the bag. so in the end, i sucked. i got only (a) question correct and thats only 4 marks?! o.O so i was pretty bumped out about it. throw me any pure mathematics asignment anytime and i think i will be better prepared. stats sucks.

so theres another assignment coming up on wednesday. prays hard i will score ALOT more better. maybe even get full marks. ha. double ha. fat hope. ever since this year, i never got full marks for assignments. man, i miss J1 where almost all of my assignments are full marks. sheesh. must be my lack of practice. never mind. JAIYOU!!

then i became a GP rep during lectures today. OKL, you have a GP rep for goodness sake. so stop passing stuff to any people you see. fully utilise EBFplease. and EBF was sitting behind me during lecture. grr. she keep benting forward and brushing against my chair. i have to practically sit upright. and i caught her staring once. scary. i dont like her.

then i came home and did econs from 9 till now. never mugged. hai. will do maths tomorrow. i hope. either that or i slack again. but i pretty much dont have a choice. cause priority is given to geo and econs during june hols and maths is purely for 'recreational' purpose. mad? i think so too.

haha. okie..rant enough. better day tomorrow!

@ 12:29 AM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

dragonboat guys are quite yummy. haha. they have just the right amount of muscles! haha..drool drool. especially that guy who first approach us at the MRT station. haha. drool drool droll.

the captain looks funny when he speaks. haha. like his having constipation. take note tomorrow when he makes announcement!! haha.. i will laugh my socks off..

while waiting i heard 2 teams (who are J1s! damn u J1s!) comment about our all girls team. hmph. dont they know girl power! *does charlie angel pose* anyway, we had an uncle with us! haha. aiya, i think our "instructor" quite kelian lor, cause once we are out at sea, we go, " Hahahaha..." then "AHhhhhh..." then "Hahahahaha.." then " Ahhhhhh"..you know the drill.

we lost in the first round if you must know. haha. so i didnt get a tan at all!!! but weilin got sunburnt?! sheesh. maybe i am a bit tan on the right arm. but then thats not nice!!!!! i see a cycling session is in order. muahaha..more sun please!

had fun. anyway, when small unhappy things happen to me at night, i tend to generate a lot of feelings about it. sometimes its like making a mountain out of a molehill..but sometimes, its like all my feelings will cme out too.

similarly, when small happy things happen at night, i will be happy. and be super hyper. i will be grinning. lotsa positive thoughts will be there. hehe..

okie, i am tired. just reacched home. going to bathe le...

thanks for the great day bernice sandie mag yuting heli charissa weilin!!!!

oh, and the church we went to today is totally different from my dads..=) haha. but i told him and he seem kinda quiet. which means he dont like it. bleah=P.

@ 8:09 PM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

i guess everyone got their 'leading' style ba. got their own unique way of communicating in the group.

my way of making decision in a group is i open the question to everyone in the group before the majority wins. not gather like 3 people and come to a conclusion then tell the other 2. cause i think thats not fair. you didnt have the input of everyone. i dont care if its 10 or 20 people in the group, i will send the same sms to everyone. even if it means exceeding my limit. at least like that everyone is informed and happy and cant say, " Hey! thats not fair. you didnt ask me."

i guess thats why i was selected as a committee in secondary school? cause i was democratic. and transparent. seriously, when i was in the committee, i always disclosed information to juan ling they all to test their reaction. so does some of the others. i guess thats what make us a friendly committee.

dont know lah.

@ 12:14 AM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

sometimes i feel like people just come to talk to me when

a) they dont want people to disturb them during lecture
b) when they are on unhappy terms with the rest
c) the rest are 'bullying' them

when everything is ok, i get discarded like some used tissue. they wont even bother to ask me what i wanted to eat and just take their money and leave. then there was only one. one sitting guarding the table. like some lonesome creature. if i am so awful to be with, why bother to come to me?

maybe its just me. maybe its not the case.

when you say "you got alot of friends who care about you!", i seriously doubt it. maybe i used to. but not now.

i'm so tired of being here. surpressed by all my childish fears..

@ 12:04 AM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

haha..tomorrow got dragonboat.

sheesh. say goodbye to the fair me. i am gonna be tan!!! haha. well, at least for awhile.

if my body is still the same, i will be fair again within 2 weeks. 2 and a half week tops. haha.

sian. scared. excited. bothered.

theres a clique within our clique.

like this new layout. nice nice.

@ 11:31 PM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

this had been a bad week.

On Sunday

i have never been this close to doing it.

the thing i always scolded my friends for doing in secondary school.

thank god i didnt have the courage.

The Rest of the Week

i remembered feeling tired.

numb. just wanted to escape.

to read some sappy story where the main character was loved. and to cry.

i used to write happy stories. people who have read my compositions in secondary school would know that no matter what the topic was i will manage to end it happily.

now? every stories that i conjour up will end up with the main character dying. and that kinda reflect my attitude towards life now.

a week without talking to my mum. after a talk with my dad, i started calling her whenever i come home instead of not calling her like the first few days. she doesnt response. so fine. she acted as if i wasnt there in the shop just now when a girl was asking for coke and she was not busy. fine. see if i care.

how long more before i actually do it?

@ 3:07 PM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

i told myself that i will catch a mini-nap at 7. in the end, i watched Amazing Race till now. -_-" its too late for me to take a mini-nap now and its dinner time soon.

so. yeah. tired tired tired.

anyway, i like rob and amber! they are such a cute and sweet couple.

i find it sweet when rob say, " i gotcha". its just sweet.

its like he knew amber was kinda worried that she will fall and she didnt say it out. but he said that! and he did catch her. sweet.

ok. rant enought le.

@ 8:04 PM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

okie, i was drugged just now. so i missed out 2 names. ber and charissa too! so if i offended anyone, sorry.

but i think they will just keep it to themselves ba.

seriously, i think i am a very intense person?! as in emotionally?

oh well, i am drugged again. hope i can pass tomorrow.

i WILL PASS tomorrow!

@ 10:46 PM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

i discovered something. dont mind me saying.

i think snoopy and gang are not very good/ not willing to voice out their unhappiness? maybe they find that it is not necessary?!

in my opinion, if you are not happy or uncomfortable about/with certain topics/person, its better if you voice it out. by swallowing it and bottling it up, you will eventually erupt. your tolerance of that person will decrease and get exhausted. and the person wont know what he/she did wrong. classic example. me and my mum, we havent been talking for the 4th day running. why? because i was unhappy and she was unhappy with me and we swallowed it.

if you feel uncomfortable talking to that person, just rant to a 3rd party. the 3rd party need not feel pressurize or feel that he/she must take sides. just listen and nod. and maybe try and look out? the last part is hard to explain.

i can sense their discomfort when i do occasionally rant about other people in our class. hmm

okie, i dont know if i have offended anyone. especially heli mag and yuting. because they are the ones who read my blog often o.O if i have sorry!!

or maybe its just casue we are not close enough.

@ 5:18 PM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

oh yeah. looking at the new batch of councillor nominees today remind me of my old council years.

looking at myself now i wonder what happen to my "leadership", my spontaneous spirit, my craziness, my friendly-ness(friendliness?!) and my humbleness. it makes me wonder why did i get into the committee in the first place?

i miss my secondary school days. everyday is craziness.it makes the stress of studying more tolerable. i was nosier. crazier.no, i should say, i was crazy seeing that i am not crazy in ny. zany. hai.

without all these, studying is just stress all the way~

I see the world around me crumble..

@ 11:33 PM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

sleepy sleepy sleepy. thats all i am feeling now..sleepy!

haha. yeah. school was rather ok today. haha. i was panicking when i was copying maths lecture notes from ber. haha..panic! but ber was calm. and taught me until i orrr...hahah..thanks!!!!=)

we are going to have giraffes in our zoo!!!!! snoopy and gang, lets go zoo and look at the giraffe. for those of you who dont know, yes, they are NEW~! we never had giraffes in our zoo. betcha didnt know that! i know because i went to the zoo after my O'level 2 years ago...

haha. maybe i should go with Lai they all again after my A'level! cool..any o how.. anyone wanna go to the zoo?!

Giraffes!! can you believe it?!

@ 11:24 PM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

muahaha...

i just saw cristiano ronaldo score a goal on tv! haha..cool...

@ 11:41 PM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

picture from the official "The Amazing Race 7" website

i actually think the guy is kinda handsome?! haha..maybe he will look nicer with shorter hair?! hm..

oh well, according to the news, he is gay..so yeah..

see. this is what NY did to me. it deprived me of handsome guys..and now, i actually think a gay is handsome?!

@ 8:46 PM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

the government just announced that there will be two integrated resorts built here.

this made me even hate my decision of coming to JC more. i should have just gone to TP and took up "Hospitality Management" because frankly, thats where my interest lies.

And after JC, no more maths. My life will suck even more in university because my strongest subject is taken away from me.

@ 5:34 PM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

Paying funds out of own pocket money.

Helping to iron/fold the clothes when shes tired.

Helping to stack up the goods in the dads shop.

Going out with her occassionally.

Doing all these on my own initiative is because i am stupid.

Thats what she say.

I am never doing them again.

Because i am not supid. She doesnt appreciate it anyway.

@ 12:00 AM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

i was just reading this story.

so three guys like a girl. then guy A kissed the girl. after that guy B who was jealous kissed the girl too. hmm..weird. wont guy B be tasting guy A's saliva too?

haha.

@ 12:23 AM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

back at home. my legs hurt. especially the sole of my foot. never ever wear heels to go walk. ouchie.

went out with san today for movie at suntec. walked passed sly's autograph session. sadly to say, it was rather empty. hmm. anyway, san is very nice! she watched "The Pacifier" again with me. hehe. thanks!!!

oh yah, we went to This Fashion today. then san was trying on this clothing so i kpo and followed her to the changing room to see. then the "salesgirls" there was like, " ah girl, can you move aside? we packing our goods here" in a very very rude voice. so i moved back. and guess what? i stepped on one of thei legs in heels. i was actually quite horrified. but then seeing how they talked to me, i dont even feel sorry for her. serve her right. and as i was walking out, i spoke rather loudly about their lousy service. i mean, in most shops, the changing room is a) not made up of flimsy cloth b) stuff full with goods c) dont allow friends to go and stay outside the place to wait for the friend. bleh.

after movie, we went to kesin's bdae party with sivan and cyn. haha. quite nice. had a good time talking=)
now i am beat. haha.

anyway, i like reading sad stories. cause they make me cry. no idea why...

@ 11:52 PM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

from DeviantArt by kittynn

so cute..and sweet...its her kids ya know?

@ 12:12 AM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

why cant NAPFA be simply just what the name suggest?

NAP-FA! a nap fan association or something instead of stupid National Annual Physical Fitness Assessment...

Was about to sleep when this thought strike me...

@ 12:09 AM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

haha..to be fair..i miss all my friends too..

wonder how many laughter i have missed? hehe

been sleeping the whole day..am goin to sleep now..stupid medicine..

key to get well: eat even when your stomach is threatening to puke them all out. take your medicine. dont wash your hair.

haha. i did all that and i got well. i didnt wash my hair last night cause i wanted to get my mum off my back. eww..

but i washed my hair 3 times today. my mum is now nagging me to wash my hair in the afternoon. yucks.

my fever medicine is not bad. i eat and i will sweat like a pig. and i mean SWEAT. my whole tee was soaked last night. i have to change my tee twice. and when you are sick, sweating is good. yeah.

i think i dont have fever le. so i decided to skip the medicine. hehe.

feel like ponning gp tomorrow.

@ 10:40 PM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

i always feel guilty when i take MC. like that time i took a 3 days MC. ~guilt~ and today..i have a 2 day MC.
i have to resist all urge to go to school today. *shivers* i definitely am going to miss alot. the first maths lecture on a new topic. geo lecture. maths tutorial. geez..hope i will eventually catch up.

the reason why i am up at this unearthly hour is because i am up to take my medicine. i feel better than i did yesterday. last night, i felt as if i have ran ten rounds or more around the track. today its feeling as if i have just ran 2.4km. so yeah...

guess what? i have to retake my NAPFA cause i missed 2.4km today. yes people..5 items and all...

@ 6:58 AM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

i am so damn bloody sick.

i barely lifted my pen today. and i think after this i am going to bed.

sheesh. i took medicine and took a 2hr nap. woke up not knowing where what time and weirdly..who i was? then i remembered blindly searching for my specs. and when i wear them i found them weird and hard/rigid.

it took me 15min before i know who i was, where i was. another 1/2hour before i knew what day and time it was. and another 5min before i found my specs okie.

geez. weird.

@ 10:39 PM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

i am going to get this off my chest. maybe i will feel better.

i dont feel good when you guys start calling people "fat ass loser" or something like that about people who didnt go for the dragonboat fun race. i know you are joking but that doesnt make me feel any better.

i am sure everyone have some deep dark secrets or things that they are afraid off. no one is NOT afraid of anything. susanto(a guy) is afraid of heights and dark. heli is scared of the dark too. i have known people who are scared of weird little things. and i am scared of water. deep pools of water. making me stand at the deep end of the pool will make me giddy and i wanna puke. images of me falling in and drowning will start slipping in.

over-active imagination? maybe. but this is one fear i am not willing and ready to overcome yet. why? maybe its because i am too chicken to do it. but maybe its because i havent find one person who i know will be there to help me SLOWLY overcome my fear. and not just "throw me in and force me to learn".

i dont expect anything. but dont make me feel bad anymore. i am already feeling guilty enough that i am not going to this "class-gathering". you think i am not as excited as weilin? i am. but i am scared. so scared that i think i might run and hide to cry. just dont laugh at my fear again. just dont say, " got life vest!!" or "i will be there to save you". because, i dont think you want people to force you into a totally dark and quiet room by yourself when you are afraid of the dark right? or force you into confine space when you are clastrophobic.

its a mental thing. and to be frank, i dont have a very strong mindset. if we were in a camp testing us on our perseverance, i will probably be the first one to throw in the towel. cause all of my might is put into perservering for better results as Mr Nandwani keep asking me to do.

for all you know, next time, my wedding will be held underwater?!?! and i will be canoeing away to my honeymoon. o.O =)

i miss being in deyi. where i can get a hug just next door or just next to me whenever i feel down.

"Hold on if you feel like letting go...Hold on it gets better than you know.."

@ 4:49 PM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

have i told you that my sis bought twins album?!
muaahaha. save me from spending...

thank goodness for sister!

@ 11:35 PM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

i am desperate. D-E-S-P-E-R-A-T-E.

for the song "Almost Here" by Brian McFadden and Delta Goodrem. its such a sad song. but it feels nice when i listen to it. a sorta comforting feeling.

anyway, as usual, i am L-A-Z-Y. i was reading story quizzes (AGAIN?!<-reaction from charissa and gang?!..see heli, i dont use snoopy and gang le) till like 8+. and then i played game till like 9. watch that nine o'clock show then bathe then laze around till now. i havent touch econs OR maths =X. so this is my plan. tomorrow finish inequalities. wednesday finish tutorial 12. yup. then after this i will go do econs. which i will probably pass off the (b) as "i dont know how to do" and leave it blank. gee. i am in a lazing mode due to the nice weather today.

anyway, i havent finish reading that story quiz so i better go and do my econs so i can quick quick read. heheh. *ahdubish*

@ 11:23 PM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

reached ang mo kio bus interchange around 12.30. met my auntie who was visiting my grandparents. so we took the same bus and talked all the way.

once i reached my dad shop, had some discussion about stuff with my auntie, dad and grandma. after that, being the guai girl that i am (*pass bucket* you can puke now), i offered to help carried the heavy stuff for my grandma and my aunt. so, this translated to me visiting my grandpa too. so i stayed there till 2. by the time i settled down to read newspaper in my dads shop it was 2.15pm. gee, then i helped my sis with some stuf, talked with my mum and my dad. so by the time i finish reading the straits time it was 4.30pm. and all "The New Paper" was sold out. -_-" grrr...

so here i am. just reached home. i ate alot of stuff just now. i ate many many choclates and i even brought home some more (today will be last choclate day until thursday)!my aunt apparently thought i was too skinny and stuffed me with nonya kuehs. my grandpa too. he gave me a packet of almond biscuits to bring home. and asked me to eat more chicken and fish. haha..my grandpa is adorable! he keeps repeating the same thing over and over again.

anyway, after visiting my grandpa, i remembered why i wanted/chose to study in JC. its because i wanted to go into university. when my aunt told my grandpa that i am going into university next year, he was like so proud. and he laughed and smiled.=) my granny too... and its all worth it. hahaha..mushy eh?

anyway, i feel kinda feel bad too. cause i called my grandpa far too loudly just now. and he kinda jumped up. literally.geez. i hope he is alright. never ever call a senior citizen from behind. must always walk in front of them and call them. it lessen the scare factor. =)

@ 4:38 PM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

adapted from DeviantArt by kittynn

isnt this picture sweet? i love it anyway.

@ 12:13 AM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

this is like my 4th entry today.

the words abit small? this template abit kidish. and i cant find song to go with it. suggestion any?

i will probably change it soon.

@ 10:07 PM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

stupid jonathan. talk not like talk like that. say few words then disappear offline liao. -_-"

haha. my sis is back. but shes leaving in like an hour. gee. i just finished econs essay. havent touch maths. aiya. i dun care liao. this is my weekend lor. i am suppose to relax not kanjiong about homework.

@ 9:47 PM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

hehe. back..

have i told you guys how much of a chicken i am!?! *does chicken dance around the room* haha..cause of the stupid movie "Samara" I avoided watching tv and listening to Power98! man..and i have to tolerate with the not-really-my-type-of-music on Perfect10..grrr(<--favorite expression now)...

man..everywhere i look is the samara thing. AHHH!!! i think i need to stay at home.

okie, forgot what i wanna write cause of the song just now... homework homework..

sky is dark its time for rain..final call you board the train...*sings all the way to her table...*

@ 6:28 PM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

oo..nice song nice song on radio..

be back soon

@ 6:23 PM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

disappointed. really disappointed.

woke up at 6.30am today to go back to Nanyang to train for my 2.4km. reached at 7.10am. i ran continuously. and i mean without stopping. and guess what?! my timing was 18.38.. and you know whatmy dad said? i walked faster than i run -_-"..cause i walked one more round after my 6th round. sheesh.

this is demoralising. last time i run 3 rounds and half walk half run in for the last three and i passed. and the timing was 15.58 last year and 4 years ago it was 15.35.. geez..i must be super woman then. anyway, i checked, my slowest timing ever (before today) was 17.15 in secondary 4 where i practically walked 4rounds! AHHH!!! this time never walk and i failed?!?!?!

i need to find someone who will guarantee chop pass to run with me. or at least to pace with me. but i cant find someone who is around my standard in my game group. i mean, heli and eileen is SUPER runner. and the only other two people i know Poh Si and Junni are SUPER SUPER runners. i mean their CCA is dragonboat and atheletics respectively!! HELLO?!!!?!

people, wish me luck. i need it. really really badly. wish me luck everytime you see me online..haha..and start praying that i will pass. i am totally exhausted now and now both side of my back hurts. REALLY hurts.

ber, thank you!! and i think yong ming is going to console me too now..

@ 8:37 PM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

hhaha..guess what they call George W Bush and his dad George Bush? the Bushes..hehe..

i found that funny...

@ 8:20 PM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

today is a laugh-fy day. haha. laugh alot alot alot. from pe all the way to geo to geo lect to maths lect to maths to geo remedial. laughed alot!! heheh..

well, obviously you guys can see that thursday is a Geo and Maths day. the only non-geo subject is PE. gee. today i had 5 items. and guess what, my shuttle run is 11.9secs. faints.

and next week is sit up and 2.4km. I WILL PASS MY 2.4KM DE!!! everyone out that better start praying hard that i will pass from today onwards. only stop on thursday!!!

haha..okie, better go. gotta do econs essay. nandwani not coming tomorrow. 10.10 sch ends..whoopeee..

my horoscopes been telling me to go out and just have fun..but i cant?!

@ 7:14 PM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

Your Love Style is Storge

For you, love and friendship are almost the same thing
And your love tends to be the enduring, long lasting kind
(You've been known to still have connections with exes)
But sometimes your love is not the most passionate
Leap before you look, and you'll find that fire you crave

What's" Your Love Style?

there that explains why i was never in a relationship. so..stop asking me why!

@ 12:22 AM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

muahahaha...in the mood for movies!!!

geksan!!!are your exams over yet?! lets go for a HAPPY movie this time. ehehe..i dont wanna COVER my EYES and EARS throughout another movie!

sivan!!! lets go and watch movie! Come on! its like once in a million years that we get to watch movie together. Save those money that you are gonna spend to watch movie with your poly friends! GO with US!

cynthia!! your exams over?! take a break take a break! movie movie movie! lets go before the price increase starts! must be kiasu.

bloody mood swings. now i feel GREAT! and its time for BED! hey! that rhymes! =)

@ 12:10 AM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

if things get too crazy at times, cry it out. how to make yourself cry?

just let all those crazy thoughts, negative thoughts flow. dont try to block them out sub-conciously. just let one out and the rest will tumble out. and then you will cry. after that, you will feel much much better. cause after all the bleakness/negativity, you will feel silly and you will laugh. you will feel much much better.

if that doesnt work. talk it out. want someone to listen? i can. seriously. even if you are just someone i dont really know, i can. well, maybe except EBF. dont feel uncomfortable. not trying to sound like some angel here. haha.

but then, i've been there done that. during blockies i felt horrible. felt that it was pointless to study. life has zero meaning except to sleep. i wake up and i look forward to sleeping. i had no one to talk to. i tried to cry but it was hard. but i felt so much better after i rant to my dad till the wee hours before + after blockies. i rant to geksan. and i felt much much better.

and if all else fails, just keep thinking, " once you've reach the bottom, the only way to go is up!"

and assign a day to rest every week after mugging..cause, "xiu xi shi wei le zou gan yao yuan de lu ( resting is for the sake of going and achieving more in the future)" ok, i am so not in the mood to do translation..haha..

SMILE!!!!!

@ 7:51 PM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

i must be mad. how many times have i said that already?

just now, i still stubbornly tell my parents that i am not tired even though i woke up at 4.30am today. and i didnt sleep in the afternoon. and i ran 2.4km in the morning(yeah, i have to emphasize on that cause i seldom run!). now i am bloody tired.

was attempting the geography corrections. i think my 1(b) is talk crap lor. 6 marks to talk about joints? i dont know what to write. and seeing the state of my brain(which is dead), i drew a before and after diagram, say joints is a common feature in all hypothesis and thats it. 6marks?! yeah. right. sayonara! at least i managed squeeze some shit out of myself. i seriously miss miss tang. i mean she is a) not always so busy like mr jonathan ng b)much much better than mr ng kim teck c)she watch amazing race d) her notes are bagus! lucky J1s. i hate J1s. i know, i use to be one too. but seriously they are rude rude rude. just today during common lunch break, this 2 girls came and ask to sit at the table me and bernice was sitting when there is so many empty tables around. are they blind?! and cant they see the enormous pile of bags on the benches. of course there are people sitting in front! and i saw J1s standing at the bookshop arguing with the bookshop about the price of foolscap. o.O

okie, bedtime! i can hear it calling. anyway, Julian Hee went to brother's school to shoot Heartlanders. damn. lucky ass. i wanna see him!! as weilin put it, he looks like my type(of guy).. hahah...*drools*

@ 12:20 AM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

Body Fat Percentage
From Self.com

Your body fat percentage is approximately 14.4 percent. (It may even be a little lower, since this calculation tends to overestimate the fat percentage of lean individuals)

While lean is generally better than overweight, you need some body fat for insulation, energy and the production of your hormones. Try not to let your body fat percentage drop below 19 percent, as the healthy body fat range for women is between 19 and 24 percent.

@ 10:42 PM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

oh yeah.

i am crazy. i actually ask my dad to drive me back to NY on Saturday. early in the morning so i can run and he can time me. haha. and of course get a ride back home afterwards in my sweaty glory..haha..

today, i ran 2.4km non-stop. well, i walked abit. but its some much lesser than when i ran last time! but i think my timing was longer?! weird. maybe walking is better for me? cause i didnt time myself when i start. fazilah siad it was 6.35am. but i am not that sure cause she arrived late so i think we started around 6.40am? if thats the case i took 16mins!! i hope so...i really really hope so. if not it will be like so demoralising. no incentives to run.

dinner now. sit and reach soon.

@ 8:58 PM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

i failed my econs essay by 0.5 marks. geez. well, at least i didnt fail as badly as i did last year during middies. i think i got 8 out of 50 then. gosh. anyway, i pass econs in general. i think together with class assignments the overall grade shouldnt be too bad. as usual, the problem this time was time management. i was rushing into my last essay so didnt really take time to consider what to write down..HELI! stop sighing lah..you passed. look on the BRIGHT side. if you sigh some more, i will sigh in front of you about my maths..=X

haha. arrived at my dad shop at 3.00 today. then helped rearrange the biscuits "display" and put up new stuff. reached home at 5.30pm..geez. and read "Sushi for beginners" till like 8..AHH!!!! i am suppose to be doing GEO corrections!!! *guilty*

haha. then i just finish playing a game call "My Fantasy Wedding"..haha. its quite "fun". you get to play games like pack gifts into your car and throw flower bonquet at your bridesmaid to prevent them from stealing your wedding gift. and you get to dress the bridesmaid in super hilarious dresses. the best men too! quite fun lah. but the trail was like only 30 minutes. its mix+match!! okie..now its nine.-_-" shit.

@ 8:49 PM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

listen people!

this song is the nicest cover of the song! i love it!! hehee..

@ 6:56 PM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

jeez. i climbed the stairs for 8 floors and now i am paying the consequence(?!). haha. i didnt know the "dont exercise" include dont climb stairs. -_-"

haha..anyway..i forgot what i want to write here le. back to homework.

@ 7:41 PM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

this is gonna sound scary.

while using the com i heard songs. chinese songs coming from somewhere near me. its as if my radio was on. so i went around the house looking for the source but in the end, i cant find it. then i asked my dad and brother if they heard songs. they said no! AHH!!

and after a while, the song stopped. i was freaked.

no surprise that i slept with the main light on and not the orange light.

@ 1:56 AM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

surprisingly my mum let me sleep till 2pm today.*bliss*

oh yeah, my mum 'forced' me to the doctor cause i was complaining that my back hurts. so i went to the doctor. he told me i pulled the muscle/nerve of my left lower back. was advised not to do any pe for at least a week. then i told him i have NAPFA(bloody) so he gave me medicine till tuesday when i have to go for the much dreaded morning run. he nods and told me to not do anything strenous(<--spelling) exercise till then and gave me some medicine for pain and to relax my back. *sigh*

anyway, been slacking around too much today. watch tv, read bk, eat, sleep, play. no homework..sheesh

i have econs tys, geo mind map(i hate mind maps!), geo corrections, maths tutorial 11. wish me luck.

want to watch "an interview with a vampire" but thought better of it. i mean, my dad hates any movie that is super natural. and vampires are kinda. so..yeah. and i think my brother would be too y oung for some blood sucking action. awww...i cant watch brad pitt or tom cruise now...

@ 9:17 PM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.

went out with cynthia geksan and sivan today. was late cause nandwani said, "2 questions and thats it.." in the end, it took 20minutes o.O

we bought what we need and cynthia left. me and geksan decided to watch a movie..and we were picking between the eye 10 and the wedding date. so we used the age old method of sicissors paper stone to decide. and the eye 10 won.

so we had pizza and went to the cinema. it was a waste of money. me and geksan were too afraid to watch it. we were covering our ears and closing our eyes for 3/4 of the show. i only watch those funny parts..geez..just found out my sis is nt coming home to sleep tonight. shit.

sigh.

@ 10:02 PM |wished.hoped.waited.dashed.