Monday, October 31, 2005
something charissa and ame will like?
cute. hahaa.
for more
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9:29 PM
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Sunday, October 30, 2005
it is VERY LATE to regret that i have chosen to taken arts in JC rather than science.
i am a science girl. everyone could tell. except me.
now i am stuck with sucky results. and a possibility of doing not that good for A's.
and i sit and wonder how easy it would be to study for science. the usual frantic rush for notes/formulas. the usual rush of achievement and adrenaline after you complete one question.
right is right. no way you can make a wrong answer sounds right.
all i can do is sit tight. buckle up my seat belt. grit my teeth and get this final battle outta the way.
I WILL PASS WITH GOOD GRADES!(all i have to do now is to convince myself.)
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3:43 PM
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what my mum bought me for breakfast. so cute that i couldnt bear to eat it(until my mum nagged me to). puts a smile on my face. haha. smiling is contagious. from babies to food. haha..
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1:23 AM
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Friday, October 28, 2005
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2:25 PM
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Thursday, October 27, 2005
i want discretion in a relationship.
so, my boyfriend next time would probably be someone whom you guys dont know.
or i will shock you when i tell you guys, "i'm getting married" bcos you guys wont even know i am attached in the first place. well, maybe SPP or lai and san will know only.
i am looking for a quiet wedding. not the whole church and banquet deal. maybe it will be a honeymoon cum wedding thing.
i am talking about all this because of something(most of u shld know) and cyn's talk abt wedding on sunday.
i
hate dun like hypocrites.
i
hate dun like people who say they will do things but didnt.
resposibilities have you heard of it?
how bout "treat people like how you want them to treat you"?
i did that. but i dun see a return. so i am treating her like how she treat me.
but then. talk is cheap.
i probably wont do it. because i cant. i am not like that.
i believe in platonic friendship.
you can be just friends with guys. no kors, no any other special thing.
obviously, many of you dont. or most of you. or most of the people me and cousin talked abt.
i always say, i will kick my boyfriend if i find out he's cheating. but i dont think i will actually do it.
i will probably be those lousy woman you see on TV who takes them back.
i dont think i will ever get attached.
because SPP predicted i will be the 1st to get married.
people have been predicting that since primary school. and i am still single.
so.
i am tired.
i did nth today.
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12:58 AM
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super cute earrings!
on the left: inuyasha ear rings. dont really look like them. but cute anyway!
on the right: sushi ear rings. so nice i feel like eating them.
by QueenofDorks. shes selling it in ebay for US$30 per pair. *faints* haha. but its nice to look at them anyway.
go to deviantart.com and search for QueenofDorks for more info.
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12:52 AM
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Tuesday, October 25, 2005
straight after the A's:
1. two new clothes. i cant be wearing the same thing over and over again.
the usage of my first paycheck:
1. $200 to parents
2. $100 to grandparents+ grandpa's fav food
3. $70 to my sister's ipod nano fund( a super belated gift)
4. $10 to the irritating brother so he can play his counter strike with his friends.
5.new
bags bcos i cant be carrying backpack all my life.
6. the La Senza bra or 2 new bras from triumph.
7. treat SPP to ice cream.8. i am broke=(
utilization of the second paycheck:
1. buy new furniture for the room which looks like squatter settlements now.
( me being the big squatter and my books the illegal immigrants)
2. $150 for the parents.
3. more new clothes.
4. save.
5. save.
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12:31 PM
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Monday, October 24, 2005
while walking towards the bus stop and we were happily chatting away. suddenly...cynthia: " did you buy any bras?"
geksan: *giggle giggle giggle*
huishan: " i like mine perfectly fine. thank you."
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12:17 PM
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Sunday, October 23, 2005
happy. went out with the gurlies. finally! the whole SPP. we meet in pizza hut again.
this is the only un-blur pic. mabel, please go and 'train' ur hubby how to take a proper pic with stable hands. haha..
look. thats taken from the same pic above. look whats captured on prem's digicam. hehe.
i miss them. prem, do come out with us more?? haha.
its nice to know that everyone is pretty much the same.
going out with them+lai gives me a different feeling from going out with snoopy and gang or anyone else. they give me a sense of reality+comfort. and i love getting the hugs at the end. especially now. thanks guys.
and stop saying that i am thin. or look sick. =) thanks for your concern though.
pics on the left. see you guys in a mth time after my A's=) till then, give me all your luck.
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8:26 PM
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Saturday, October 22, 2005
found this website that 'decodes' name.
haha. lame.
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1:14 AM
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Thursday, October 20, 2005
a quick entry. (while waiting for weilin to reply me her her time of arival)
i am super deprived of sleep. slept at 4 like that(was reading a book from 3 onwards). then my father woke me up at 7 am! bloody 7am! and guess what?! i only have to be in school at 9.40am! oh my god! so i am here wondering how i will survive the long hours of the morning.
anyway, the good thing about my brother being at home 24/7 with nothing to do is that he will be hogging the coomputer 24/7 playing his darling maplestory. seriously. that guy is getting addicted. he even pay real money for fake money in the game(mesos i think thats what they are called). *faints* ha. so i have been staying away from the computer for quite a long period of time. hahah.
and guys! i am suppose to be the one who is mugging her guts out for alevels! so why am i always the one organising SPP outings
AGAIN? maybe i should start collecting money for all these things. hmmm. do you want me to organise my own and geksan's birthday gathering too? hmn. how about the date you guys go and buy our pressies? hmm.. hahaha. do it yourselves peeps! at least do help organise some ok? i am sick of it. and my a's end on 17th nov! so i want a gathering before our bdae! so hee! go and organise one ok?! hahaa.
and i think i will organise and pull up the PSL alumni after my A's. i will be the organiser. no promise though.
okay. gotta go soon.
my mum told me that she might have to go for another operation. but she dont want to go before my alevel. grr.. why? because she knows i cant take it and she wants me to have nutritious food before every paper. *sigh* lets hope she wont need to go for another one ba. that would be the best! please pray for her? and from now on, i am reading every single one of her medical report. even if i dont understand half the thing its saying. but with my little bio knowledge, i will know abit. ha. so she cant bluff me that she dont need to go. and the chance of her springing it on me after my alevels will be minimum. and i can persuade her to go for the op before my a's. grrr.
ok. thats all. i got more to say. but i am late. dads gonna kill me.
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8:41 AM
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Tuesday, October 18, 2005
new arrivals. haha. more late nights thats later. hmm. u get that?
but some lousy covers.
a boyband esp tutu 5566 with pink? a definite nono. haha.
nive cover. cause its in the right shade of pink*winks* but i dont really like sharon au..haha
my favorite this mth after shape. i didnt bring that up. nice nice. nice clothes too!
can u see i am REALLY sick. fever again. haha. ok. off to bed. alevel turned me into a lazy bum who criticise. hmmm..
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1:04 PM
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Sunday, October 16, 2005
went to the national library. they are all NEW books. NEW as in intact with the new book smell.
thats charisa's CSI book in the left corner.
the newest of all...
it came out like early this year! and this small paperback version just came out recently.*faints* i am dying from happiness. i think. everyone shld go there. not for the books. but its nice. pleny of space to study!
pretty sky after rain.
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10:00 PM
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Friday, October 14, 2005
the pictures says it all. had an excellent time out the WHOLE day. shall mug harder tomorrow. i feel much better now.
me san lai
and the 2 of themwere made to pose with the wand! haha. and they grew afraid of the camera after awhile. snoopy and gang shld know.
more happy memories on the left.
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11:58 PM
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wished.hoped.
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hmm..had my first one-on-one consultation with nandwani.
scary? definitely. half the time i blank out when he asked me question. and i know where my problem lies. no evaluation. or in his words, "you are not getting personal enough. you are looking at the broad picture. but when it comes to explaining, you die out. you dont ask urself enough questions."
ok. i shall ask myself more questions. the what ifs. i will try. meeting him again next tuesday at 10.30am after econs. and he asked me to bring along my peers. so snoopy and gang interested? he says its good if we get to hear different viewpoints. PLEASE? just do any
macro outlines. PLEASE? hahaa. and its quick. half an hour and chop chop done! definitely more productive than some other tutor we know of.
on a side note. the first thing he asked me when we sat down was, " so how are you feeling?" obviously, i guess he can see how i actually felt huh? so i told him abit about how i feel. (maybe he kinda only expected the American answer. the "fine but.." not the long one) and he told me to look on the bright side and that "..at the end of the day its not about the results. its knowing that you have tried your best.." orr..
will definitely miss him and miss ng as my tutors. and of course the class. hehe. want to talk about the class but the feel not there. haha. next time ba.
later.
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1:13 AM
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Wednesday, October 12, 2005
i uploaded the pictures! at the expense of my nap..hehe..heres something funny:
haha. i am probably gonna get killed. =P
you know the drill. linkie on the left.
more later.
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4:47 PM
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was reading my archives when i came across this.
seriously, why didnt anyone stop me when i liked him in sec 1? sivan?! haha.
but if u guys did, i will probably screech at you huh?=P
he looks much better now :)
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12:44 AM
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wished.hoped.
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cool right? he looks good. ahh. back to the good old
feeling of boy-crazyness.
difference? no prem cyn or lai to drool with me. haha.
somehow it just feels different.
as usual, got it from deviantart.
the good old butt viewing and g-string guessing days.
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12:25 AM
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Monday, October 10, 2005
lai zihui!!! where are you?!
i got so many things to tell you! and you havent tell me your story so i can kick you (or so you say)! hahaa.
there are some things i can tell lai only. well, lai and san. well, and cyn and sivan.
wait a minute. but isnt that everyone?!
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11:55 AM
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Sunday, October 09, 2005
i have a little confession.
i didnt touch anything at all for the past week!
first, i had to deal with the whole suicidal phrase for the past 2 week. got out of it. feeling pretty normal again. but then i became super vain. and i am having concentration problem.
getting me to concentrate has never been so hard. i will go into my room. sit down and write something for 10mins. then? i will get out, have a drink of water, go back in and stone for like 15 minutes. told myself i should concentrate + get a move on. and then the whole cycle repeats! help!
and guess what? i am finishing the book i just bought. *faints*
i realised something! i have quite a lot of snadals/slippers. but i didnt buy any of it. my sis did. see, during her charles and keith craze phase, she went and bought a pair of heels (which she dont even know how to walk in), a pair of slipper like shoes thats as stiff as wood(what other objects are stiff?), and of course my favorite pair of shoes! hehehe.
and of course the clothes. to be correct, it should be the sweaters. she bought 2 FOX sweater, a Addias windbreaker, and a purple with white stripes(my current favorite) sweater from 77th street. they are all brand new! and she didnt wear them for like a mth? she buys and hand it in her closet. so, instead of letting them turn yellow, she gave them to me. well, except for the purple one. i havent remind her of its existence.
and of course the recenly acquired black top+black sleeveless top she bought from topshop. oh! and that skirt! all glittery. hahaha. but its rather short. well, in my mums opinion.
ahaha. the joy of having a sister and me being her "fashion consultant"! i know every single item in her cupboard. but now she moved out and all she ever wear are white and some formal bottom(her work clothes). i dont have any new clothes or shoes! so i better start earning some bucks if i want to expand my wardrobe and before people accuse me of wearing the same thing over and over again. hahaa.
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11:51 PM
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wished.hoped.
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since inuyasha ended on arts central, they showed 2 new anime.
scrapped princess and peacemaker. thought they were pretty sucky at the start. but then..
the latter got me liking 2 characters.
susumu the spy tetsu
the kid with orange hair
scrapped princess made me fell in love with guys who have hair like below...
shannon
fulle. i liked him and guess what? he died in 2 episodes.-_-"
and its so hard to look for their pictures. these are the ones i got.
ok. this is just to remind myself in the future of the stuff i liked. hee..
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12:59 AM
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Saturday, October 08, 2005
muahahaa. when i showed my mum the baby posters in my room, her reaction was, " you're not married. why put these kinda things?" hahaaa..
BUT! i love babies, toddlers and kids!! i adore them.
but then, yuting!! i dont want give birth to a football team! 2 is enough. i think. maybe one. hahaha.
but i rather like single-hood. cant imagine myself getting married in the future. yikes. eventually i think..
feeling feministic now. hahaa. wonderful feeling. rather than feeling sucidal. or all stressed out.
lalala...
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10:17 PM
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Friday, October 07, 2005
guess what? i bought baby posters! and here they are...
cute eh? hehehe. i think they will make me smile every morning since they will be the first thing i see every morning!
and guess what? i bought the undomestic goddess at $28.95(faints)! i hope it will be a good read . and this is my favorite pair of slippers/sandals(?)
did you notice they are pink?! hahaa. my sis bought it and she didnt wear. so i benefited. as always. haha. hmm..thats where i dont buy clothes! or shoes in this case. haha.
and the dark chocolate i cant bear to eat from my cousin who just return from the UK. they are 70% bitter!
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8:14 PM
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i'm feeling pretty much me again.
i think all i needed was someone to offer me some help or another.
and i got it.
thanks ber=)
and i probably mention his name quite a few times these past days. my furthest friend! its nice to listen to someonr else talking about things OTHER than homework.and guess what? i like knowing and meeting new people. so bring on the strangers! haha.
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11:52 AM
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Thursday, October 06, 2005
nandwani asked for photos. so i searched
link on the left.
quite nice act. theres some more with snopy n ber.
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11:29 PM
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Wednesday, October 05, 2005
doing econs mcqs just now and i almost cried. staring at the pathetic mark i got for essay.
everyone tells me, "it could be worse". i guess so.
i am in the bottom 20% for GP. and just now while doing GP P2, i couldnt think.
i want it to stop. please just make it stop.
i want to feel me again.
if not, i woouldnt want to feel anything at all.
if i had the courage, i would have ended it all.
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1:27 PM
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i like this pic. its taken by a guy. and this is what he wrote:
When with you im invincible, protected by your smell,
when I think of not being the one who kisses you, I think of a living hell.
For as long as I can remember, ive always been afraid,
but once ive held you in my sleep, the dreams go on for days.
Ive looked at our reflection baby, I cant believe what I see.
A girl so truly beautiful is standing there with me.
Ive gazed into your eyes, as you looked into mine, its purity in its finest form, ive lost my grasp of time.
I only have a small regret... that whats locked up in my mind.
Are the most amazing photographs where I document our lives.
Eternity is forever, but id wait forever more,
because im no longer just waiting, for that thing worth waiting for.
sweet. and the pic is called, "I could never sleep alone". by =nuozek
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12:21 AM
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Tuesday, October 04, 2005
i finally talked/IM my "penpal" (or should i say friend?)! its an amzing feat. because he lives in the US!
hehee. fun fun fun. initially was quite reserved cause i'm scared my english was lousy. but later on, i didnt care! hahaa.
hurry up and get famous! i want to go to America. hahaa.-_-"
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1:17 PM
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on a side note. joshua(my junior) has been sending me a smile in friendster for 2 consecutive days. he is probably bored out of his wits. but still, its crazy spontaneous things like this that makes me smile. hence, i love my coun JUNIORS!
well. not all. those who are still in touch. and get this, i am not close to the girls at all. closer to the guys. or used to.
now they all disappear off the face of the earth like that. except for joshua(hes the one whos still very much in contact with the seniors), yiquan(i must msg him then he will reply-_-"), weishun(because he is in NY), allan and vincent(i just msged them for promos). yah. thats abt it.
jerold? ha. he used to be my "son". the closest among the guys. but then, he almost like extinct. sms him never reply. sheesh.
whats wrong with some of them? think ling and juan got same problem.
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11:31 AM
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hm. i thought i have cried my fill these few days.
but. while sitting in my dad's car on the way to school, i realised i havent. there's still this choking feeling in me. i need to let it go. somehow. how?
and my panic attack (shortness of breath) is coming back. it happened in the car just now. its so hard.
can i stop now?
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11:16 AM
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I NEED TO GO TO THE LIBRARY!i need books to read people. desperately.hahaa. been trying to go to the library.sunday was too late. it closed at 5. and i didnt want to rush.i am on a mission to trick my dad to drive me to the AMK library.the school library is crap.or i may have to start buying books.help!its my only form of escape. it takes me imagination running.
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12:09 AM
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Sunday, October 02, 2005
blogger is screwed up. the box is not coming out right..hm..and i cant upload any photos! so its back to good old photobucket.com
went out with snoopy gang today! nice nice. had fun. and as usual a whole day wasted*guilty* i didnt do much during the period of study cause i keep kajiao-ing heli. hahaha.
corspe bride was alright. but it is nt worth the movie ticket price. lucky we didnt pay. hee. so for those of you who havent watch, wait for the VCD!!! hahaa..lalaaa..
as usual went to some new eating place with them. hahaa. i swear, the kids are getting more and more pampered! i mean that was the first time i stepped into that place and it cost quite a bomb! they are like primary 6 or less and they went there with $50-bill by themselves! *faints* all little "princess" in training huh?
heres the photo
more on the right hand link. okok. better go and make the best of whats left of my sunday.
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9:15 PM
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Saturday, October 01, 2005
the niagara falls have migrated to my face. been crying and crying and crying.
worse! when i went to visit my grandparents because its my granny birthday, i burst out crying. why? because my grandad said, " you are so pretty.." the more they showed me concern, the harder i cried. my grandad, as forgetful as he is, remembered me. and my granny came and give me hug. shes all soft and cuddly.
somehow, i feel that i have failed my parents and everybody else who have confidence in me. how can i do so badly after all the mugging and make them worry?
initially i wanted to skip the family gathering at night. but then my uncle came over and persuaded me to go. in other words, everyone was very nice to me. thanks! especially jiawen and qiye who spent almost all of the gathering with me in my grandparents room. so i am glad i went anyway.
AND! i promise i will start resting. i will try to relax.
and to yuting! thanks woman! lets work harder together! haha. snoopy gang too ok?!
lots to say. but i am thankful for having my BIG family. i wouldnt trade it for the world.
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11:45 PM
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wished.hoped.
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what my mum bought me for breakfast. so cute that i couldnt bear to eat it(until my mum nagged me to). puts a smile on my face. haha. smiling is contagious. from babies to food. haha..
thats charisa's CSI book in the left corner.
me san lai
cool right? he looks good. ahh. back to the good old
fulle. i liked him and guess what? he died in 2 episodes.-_-"
shans 
